Here, Masquerading as There.

I can't believe I'm writing a post based on my experience of a burger.

It can be stated - on moderately good authority - that Americans eat cheaper food that is worse for you. This is in opposition to Europeans who spend almost 10 times the percentage we do and buy less, more often.

Which shows that fresh food, while more expensive, is much better for you in the long run - their obesity rate is a fraction of ours.

Being diabetic - you didn't know? - I have to pay (fairly) close attention to what I eat, and when. Most of my meals are planned - or at least strikingly predictable.  They have to be because I don't really have time to hit the food court every day and even if I did I can't afford the money.

Controllable with exercise and moderate drugs my condition can be considered a proud expression of my Native heritage.  We are so prone to Type 2 Adult Onset diabetes that I'd feel I was betraying my heritage as a man of the Cherokee Tribe if I didn't have the disease.

Breakfast and lunch are very, very consistent.  Dinner, however, can be a problem, one that I'm generally slow to work out.  The day of work that doesn't end with a crockpot full of stew (or other expectant dinner)  can be a bit of a mess.

So saying I got home from work after visiting a friend and chatting over mugs of tea (very under-rated) thing, tea is). There wasn't time to fix dinner - for logistical/temporal reasons - so I wound up at Three Dollar Dewey's, a local beer and popcorn emporium.

The cup of chowder was welcome but my eyes were bigger than my tummy and I ordered a Greek burger - lamb patties, yogurt-spiced sauce and an extra pickle (Mom always said I should have a green vegetable at every meal.

Since it was lamb - ground lamb, at that - I should have ordered it well-done but I foolishly had it medium and I think it was spiritually still hanging around.

I remember thinking at the time "you don't really need this" - "the soup should hold you over, don't get the sandwich" - but I proceeded to turn my tummy upside down (it seems to have been too great a coincidence to be an accident).

So now I'm finally settling down with a good book. The burger may have gone in like a lamb but it's sticking around like a lion.

My attitudes toward food have to become convictions - and then be adhered to with courage because they are so. It's not enough for taking a moderately healthy approach to food be a duty, it has to be something akin to programmed as something that is a part of your life - so that if you're not doing something it feels wrong and you correct it.

To go back to an earlier post your approach to dealing with the negative feelings - the voice that guides you away from your true North - that voice is simply an old, self destructive program, one that can be co-opted to lead to a new, more sane place.

 We can act above what we think we are condemned to do.